I had a getaway with Emily last April, coming end of the month I'm bringing Michelle for a 3 days, 2 nights trip to Langkawi organized by my college. Below is our meeting this morning:
Me: Let's have a meeting
Girls: Meeting??? Looked puzzled
Me: End of the month mummy going to Langkawi
Girls: Ar... protesting faces..
Me: But mummy can bring only one of you because mummy cannot take care of both for out of town trip... since mummy brought Emily to KL last April, this time mummy plan to bring Michelle
Michelle: Eyes big big, looked all excited
Emily: Sobbing and wiping tears already (poor girl)
Me : Listen first, I have not finish...
Me : The date mummy is going is from XX to XX, the same date that Sophia jeh jeh is getting married (Sophia is Emily's kindy teacher) and we were actually looking forward for her wedding cum dinner.
Me : Emily can wear your new polka dot dress, wear your new ring that daddy bought and have a good time, take photo with teacher and see teacher in wonderful wedding and evening gowns...
Emily : Stop crying and realized it was not a bad idea after all
Me: Emily get to spend special time with daddy alone, daddy will bring you out.
Emily : I want to go to Popular, buy coloring book and coloring pencils..
Me: Just ask daddy and daddy will do it (ha ha)
Me: So now Michelle still wants to follow?
Michelle: Want!
Me: You don't want to wear your new dress, wear your new ring and see the bride?
Michelle: I want to follow you!
Me: OK then, settle, meeting over.. calling daddy... we've settled the negotiation, now you do your part eh...
All: Very happy....
Thursday, November 5, 2009
Monday, November 2, 2009
Communication Essence of a Healthy Marriage
I remembered many years ago, my boss told us, a group of managers that the essence of good leadership is good communication and she started to share a series of training which included what is true communication, the importance of it and also the consequences if good communication is not present.
As God has blessed my marriage, I truly believe that apart from letting God to be the head of the sacred communion (this is vital and most important), good communication between hubby and I sealed our marriage. Many couples do not have problem communicating during those courting years but many did in their marriage later on.
Of course not everything is smooth sailing between hubby and I but as we thread this journey together, we realized communication is very important and essence to a healthy marriage.
Communication is more than talking verbally to your partner, that is talking… communication is both giving and receiving at the same time. I realized when we live for ourselves rather than for one another and with one another, then that is the very moment we stop communicating.
There’s no doubt that as partner of lives, we are still entitled to time of our own, doing things that we like and spending time with people whom we cherished but as husband and wife especially for those who are married for years, sometimes we just stop communicating (maybe we think we know each other too well or simply we do not have to… thinking each should understand our body language after many years being together). I believe if that happens, Satan has succeeded in his first attempt.
Many couples have lost their first love for their partner, being together is more like a commitment rather than emotional feeling for one another. Wives are preoccupied with the welfare of the children and household, husbands are busy with building careers, all these are done for the sake of the family, but sometimes all these are done at the expense of our other half.
How would we treat our other half? Our spouse is like our other half, would we stop feeding the other half after many years, definitely no, if we were to do that then it is like a slow death, slowly depriving our other half of the nutrients that is required for continual growth. Stop communicating is the very first sign of us neglecting and depriving the other half and soon it may be too late to feed the other half once cracks start developing…
For those who have not stopped communicating with your spouse, I wish you well, keep on the good work, and find creative ways to communicate with your other half. Let us kneel down and pray that God will protect the many marriage unions that has stop communicating, healed the hurts and revived their hearts that they will truly start communicating again.
To end this, I would like to share how hubby and I communicate; we want to bless you as God bless us.
I:
1) Find time to cook him his favorite meal, not the children’s for I always agreed to this old phrase – “The way to the man’s heart is through his stomach”
2) Iron for him for this is the thing I hate most, by ironing his shirts; he knows that I love him…
3) Prepare the kids early to bed, so that both of us have time to talk and share what has happened in a peaceful environment.
4) Let him do his favorite things but with the understanding of the time he will be away.
5) Tell him what is bothering you, trust me, men will not just know
6) Teach the children to value, honor and respect their father
7) Dress up just for him, put on perfume... and gifts from him
8) Date him….
9) Tell him you need his time
10) Submit to him
He:
1) Remembers my birthday and our wedding anniversary
2) Takes the effort to plan something memorable for those special dates
3) Reminds me of his love frequently through e-mails, sms, msn…
4) Buys me gifts randomly
5) Washes my car
6) Irons for me when he has to do the ironing himself
7) Dates me
8) Holds my hand
9) Communicates with me
10) Teaches me and uphold me in my biblical understanding
11) Is sensitive towards my needs
So you see communication is hard labor, if your other half is worth your time to court before marriage and spent hours communicating before marriage, how much more you need to court and communicate with her/him for the years to come. It is our prayers that you find the joy and fruit of your effort... please do not stop communicating and let Satan become a foothold in your marriage.
As God has blessed my marriage, I truly believe that apart from letting God to be the head of the sacred communion (this is vital and most important), good communication between hubby and I sealed our marriage. Many couples do not have problem communicating during those courting years but many did in their marriage later on.
Of course not everything is smooth sailing between hubby and I but as we thread this journey together, we realized communication is very important and essence to a healthy marriage.
Communication is more than talking verbally to your partner, that is talking… communication is both giving and receiving at the same time. I realized when we live for ourselves rather than for one another and with one another, then that is the very moment we stop communicating.
There’s no doubt that as partner of lives, we are still entitled to time of our own, doing things that we like and spending time with people whom we cherished but as husband and wife especially for those who are married for years, sometimes we just stop communicating (maybe we think we know each other too well or simply we do not have to… thinking each should understand our body language after many years being together). I believe if that happens, Satan has succeeded in his first attempt.
Many couples have lost their first love for their partner, being together is more like a commitment rather than emotional feeling for one another. Wives are preoccupied with the welfare of the children and household, husbands are busy with building careers, all these are done for the sake of the family, but sometimes all these are done at the expense of our other half.
How would we treat our other half? Our spouse is like our other half, would we stop feeding the other half after many years, definitely no, if we were to do that then it is like a slow death, slowly depriving our other half of the nutrients that is required for continual growth. Stop communicating is the very first sign of us neglecting and depriving the other half and soon it may be too late to feed the other half once cracks start developing…
For those who have not stopped communicating with your spouse, I wish you well, keep on the good work, and find creative ways to communicate with your other half. Let us kneel down and pray that God will protect the many marriage unions that has stop communicating, healed the hurts and revived their hearts that they will truly start communicating again.
To end this, I would like to share how hubby and I communicate; we want to bless you as God bless us.
I:
1) Find time to cook him his favorite meal, not the children’s for I always agreed to this old phrase – “The way to the man’s heart is through his stomach”
2) Iron for him for this is the thing I hate most, by ironing his shirts; he knows that I love him…
3) Prepare the kids early to bed, so that both of us have time to talk and share what has happened in a peaceful environment.
4) Let him do his favorite things but with the understanding of the time he will be away.
5) Tell him what is bothering you, trust me, men will not just know
6) Teach the children to value, honor and respect their father
7) Dress up just for him, put on perfume... and gifts from him
8) Date him….
9) Tell him you need his time
10) Submit to him
He:
1) Remembers my birthday and our wedding anniversary
2) Takes the effort to plan something memorable for those special dates
3) Reminds me of his love frequently through e-mails, sms, msn…
4) Buys me gifts randomly
5) Washes my car
6) Irons for me when he has to do the ironing himself
7) Dates me
8) Holds my hand
9) Communicates with me
10) Teaches me and uphold me in my biblical understanding
11) Is sensitive towards my needs
So you see communication is hard labor, if your other half is worth your time to court before marriage and spent hours communicating before marriage, how much more you need to court and communicate with her/him for the years to come. It is our prayers that you find the joy and fruit of your effort... please do not stop communicating and let Satan become a foothold in your marriage.
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
Our Saturdays..
Last Sat, I plan for an impromptu trip to the nearby beach with my girls, this time very odd because without the daddy. You must be wondering why eh.. because daddy went for training with uncle Richard to prepare themselves for the charity ride the next day.
Early in the morning after the usual errands, I woke the kids from their slumber, rushed them to finish their milk, packed a bag of stuff (some snacks, tools for sand castle building, water, a change of clothes) and off we go.
Since the entrance to the beach are without any proper tar road, I decided to drive daddy’s super road bully (the Prado), was drizzling on the way, I asked the kids to pray and when we reached God stopped the rain and we began our fun time.
Chose the perfect spot, spread the mat and we start building whatever that comes into our mind. Later, hand in hand we went down for a stroll, let the sea water washed our feet, collected memorable from mother nature and decided to make our move.
It’s great spending time with the girls… I’m already planning what to do this coming Sat and again without daddy because he will be away for a seminar….hope daddy is having a super duper time just like we would enjoy our super duper time together.
Early in the morning after the usual errands, I woke the kids from their slumber, rushed them to finish their milk, packed a bag of stuff (some snacks, tools for sand castle building, water, a change of clothes) and off we go.
Since the entrance to the beach are without any proper tar road, I decided to drive daddy’s super road bully (the Prado), was drizzling on the way, I asked the kids to pray and when we reached God stopped the rain and we began our fun time.
Chose the perfect spot, spread the mat and we start building whatever that comes into our mind. Later, hand in hand we went down for a stroll, let the sea water washed our feet, collected memorable from mother nature and decided to make our move.
It’s great spending time with the girls… I’m already planning what to do this coming Sat and again without daddy because he will be away for a seminar….hope daddy is having a super duper time just like we would enjoy our super duper time together.
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Michelle Vs Emily
A friend told me that you can actually get your kids' finger prints scanned and intepreted e.g. their character, learning style, potential future vocation bla bla bla. Ah.. to me that's equivalent to fortune/future telling which sort of against my principles and beliefs. To me I don't need to go to so called "experts" to do the intepretation about my kids.. this is my observation about my princesses so far and the differences are quite obvious, of course for they are uniquely fashioned by God eventhough both are being produced almost the same way (I think! ha ha) and obviously from the same "factory" and resources (ha ha).
Michelle vs Emily
1) Followed by the rules vs Rules? What are they, I play by my rules! (pengsan)
2) Systematic, organized vs Free flowing of ideas and creativity and most of the time the destroyer
3) Her love language is words, spending time with her vs Lots of kisses, hugs and play time together
4) Love to read and write vs Draw, draw and draw
5) Dress conventionally vs Fashionable
6) Could not be bother much about her appearance vs Won't leave home without looking at the mirror twice or more
7) Stick to her ambition (teacher) vs An English teacher, nurse, art teacher, now a doctor wor..
8) Learn faster through reading and writing vs Learn through action
9) Future vocation: Teacher vs Artist
What about your kids, are they totally different?
Squirel in the garden
No, not squirrel in my garden but the college's nursery. On my way to class this morning, I dropped by at the college's nursery and see what I could possibly "possessed" for my new garden, I spotted a squirrel (or it spotted me) with its long bushy tail and holding some "stolen" food leaving the nursery in a hurry. Ha ha caught it red handed. I used to spot squirrels balancing its act on the telephone cables back at my parents' house whenever I stood by the balcony to enjoy my "lau jia's" scenery. They are indeed cheeky, swift little creatures which reminded me of the Disney's character, Chip & Dale which are crazy over Donald's nuts. They are also hubby's favourite Disney characters.
Monday, October 19, 2009
Updates on my princesses
I realized I've not been blogging about my 2 princesses lately... here's an update of them.
Lil Emily:
5 years, 7 months and 27 days old as of today.
Lost 2 of her bottom incisors last week, blame on me lar, she asked for an apple, normally I cut for her, this time I was too lazy, washed it and asked her to bite it, the green apple proofed to be too hard for her tiny teeth, both incisors were badly shaken and permanently removed last week, one by MIL and the other one in my hands...
Completed her 2nd assessment on 4 subjects, as of now she said she got two 100%, happy go lucky and now enjoying her holidays already, everyday drawing, dressing up, building blocks, cutting the barbie's doll hair and anything that she could lay her hands onto...
Growing well and certainly is catching up real fast, about inches shorter than Jeh Jeh, her palms and fingers are basically longer than the Jeh Jeh already, face also slightly bigger than Michelle already. I believe in a year or so Emily will be on par or bigger size than Jeh Jeh...
Michelle Jeh Jeh:
7 years 3 months and 8 days old as of today.
So far lost all her 8 front incisors (top and bottom, 3 grew up from the bottom row and 2 coming up soon from the top row, can see little tiny white spot protruding from her gums.
Completed her 4th assessment and performance so far is quite inconsistent with position 20th, 11th, 3rd and this time maybe 15th or so in the class... Primary 1 is so competitive, the average marks is by 2 decimal points.
Growing well, eating more nowadays with good appetite, when I bathed her I realized she's expanding side ways with her round figure, still petite for her age. I asked her to jump and stretch her hands and legs so that she can grew taller and maintain as a Jeh Jeh physically.
She dislike it when people asked if they were twins and vowed that she will eat more to grow up quickly.
Plays well with lil Emily nowadays but still act like the big sister with her demanding tone and bossy attitude (what to do, in fact she is the big sister mah).
I thank God for my angels...
Lil Emily:
5 years, 7 months and 27 days old as of today.
Lost 2 of her bottom incisors last week, blame on me lar, she asked for an apple, normally I cut for her, this time I was too lazy, washed it and asked her to bite it, the green apple proofed to be too hard for her tiny teeth, both incisors were badly shaken and permanently removed last week, one by MIL and the other one in my hands...
Completed her 2nd assessment on 4 subjects, as of now she said she got two 100%, happy go lucky and now enjoying her holidays already, everyday drawing, dressing up, building blocks, cutting the barbie's doll hair and anything that she could lay her hands onto...
Growing well and certainly is catching up real fast, about inches shorter than Jeh Jeh, her palms and fingers are basically longer than the Jeh Jeh already, face also slightly bigger than Michelle already. I believe in a year or so Emily will be on par or bigger size than Jeh Jeh...
Michelle Jeh Jeh:
7 years 3 months and 8 days old as of today.
So far lost all her 8 front incisors (top and bottom, 3 grew up from the bottom row and 2 coming up soon from the top row, can see little tiny white spot protruding from her gums.
Completed her 4th assessment and performance so far is quite inconsistent with position 20th, 11th, 3rd and this time maybe 15th or so in the class... Primary 1 is so competitive, the average marks is by 2 decimal points.
Growing well, eating more nowadays with good appetite, when I bathed her I realized she's expanding side ways with her round figure, still petite for her age. I asked her to jump and stretch her hands and legs so that she can grew taller and maintain as a Jeh Jeh physically.
She dislike it when people asked if they were twins and vowed that she will eat more to grow up quickly.
Plays well with lil Emily nowadays but still act like the big sister with her demanding tone and bossy attitude (what to do, in fact she is the big sister mah).
I thank God for my angels...
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
Will you give?
For the past weeks, the following verse kept coming back to me:
Whoever has this world’s goods, and sees his brother in need, and shuts up his heart from him, how does the love of God abide in him? —1 John 3:17
I remember this phrase while doing my devotion the other day “The word of God are not meant to inform us but transform us”. Hubby also shared with me that each biblical teaching besides rooted from the word of God should direct us back to God, it’s powerless to do thing on our own but we need the ever empowering power from God to live a life He called us to live.
I consider myself a person of action, I can relate better to Martha rather than Mary but often God reminds me to be like Mary who sits at the feet of Jesus, feed on what is more important and then only go forth, transformed and empowered to do what God wants me to do. (Luke 10:38-42)
I believe that through His empowerment and outpour of love to me, then I’m able to love others in return…. Recently I found myself……
Touched to stop by at a bus stop seeing 2 elderly couple waiting for a bus, since I’ve drove passed them, I took a big turn, hoping to stop and ask if they needed a lift and only realized that the turn that I took could not possible reached the bus stop again…since I don’t have time to make the correct turn all over again (excuse!), I drove to work thereafter…. For the next few days, I was unable to sight the couple again… (Lesson learned – Don’t hesitate, if you can offer help at that moment, please do it as you may not have a second chance.)
While msn with my ex-colleague, we found out another ex-colleague’s father had passed away recently, somehow it just occurred to us that we can still do something so I organized a lunch, shared how I felt that we still can do something, together we came out with a love gift, bought her kids two packet of KFC snack plate and just dropped by for a surprise visit. We were comforted as we comforted her. That’s what God says about giving freely without expecting anything in return, I felt joy.
Calling a friend who is having tremendous stress in her current job, called her but she was too busy, she returned my call and I slept, I sms her and finally we were able to talk…listening is just what we need to do at times.
Listening to a friend’s call as she is going through a very difficult situation, she shared the ordeal she had gone through, I supplemented with my own experience, now I knew why God put me into certain situation, so that I can comfort others in similar situation.
Surfing the internet and got myself a good book by Yvonne Foong, this is the very first time I bought something over the internet, issued her the amount and slipped a card just to encourage her to continue to be hopeful. I’m encouraged by her life.
Receiving a bad news that one of my student’s father had passed away in a car accident. I dropped a mail to her, expressed my sympathy and gave her additional week to work on her assignment, I cannot remove her pain but I hope this will encourage her to complete her 100% based assignment and move on…
I’m no angel and definitely not in a position to change anything by myself but it’s God who is at work.
Whoever has this world’s goods, and sees his brother in need, and shuts up his heart from him, how does the love of God abide in him? —1 John 3:17
I remember this phrase while doing my devotion the other day “The word of God are not meant to inform us but transform us”. Hubby also shared with me that each biblical teaching besides rooted from the word of God should direct us back to God, it’s powerless to do thing on our own but we need the ever empowering power from God to live a life He called us to live.
I consider myself a person of action, I can relate better to Martha rather than Mary but often God reminds me to be like Mary who sits at the feet of Jesus, feed on what is more important and then only go forth, transformed and empowered to do what God wants me to do. (Luke 10:38-42)
I believe that through His empowerment and outpour of love to me, then I’m able to love others in return…. Recently I found myself……
Touched to stop by at a bus stop seeing 2 elderly couple waiting for a bus, since I’ve drove passed them, I took a big turn, hoping to stop and ask if they needed a lift and only realized that the turn that I took could not possible reached the bus stop again…since I don’t have time to make the correct turn all over again (excuse!), I drove to work thereafter…. For the next few days, I was unable to sight the couple again… (Lesson learned – Don’t hesitate, if you can offer help at that moment, please do it as you may not have a second chance.)
While msn with my ex-colleague, we found out another ex-colleague’s father had passed away recently, somehow it just occurred to us that we can still do something so I organized a lunch, shared how I felt that we still can do something, together we came out with a love gift, bought her kids two packet of KFC snack plate and just dropped by for a surprise visit. We were comforted as we comforted her. That’s what God says about giving freely without expecting anything in return, I felt joy.
Calling a friend who is having tremendous stress in her current job, called her but she was too busy, she returned my call and I slept, I sms her and finally we were able to talk…listening is just what we need to do at times.
Listening to a friend’s call as she is going through a very difficult situation, she shared the ordeal she had gone through, I supplemented with my own experience, now I knew why God put me into certain situation, so that I can comfort others in similar situation.
Surfing the internet and got myself a good book by Yvonne Foong, this is the very first time I bought something over the internet, issued her the amount and slipped a card just to encourage her to continue to be hopeful. I’m encouraged by her life.
Receiving a bad news that one of my student’s father had passed away in a car accident. I dropped a mail to her, expressed my sympathy and gave her additional week to work on her assignment, I cannot remove her pain but I hope this will encourage her to complete her 100% based assignment and move on…
I’m no angel and definitely not in a position to change anything by myself but it’s God who is at work.
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