Thursday, May 7, 2009

A lesson worth RM1.20

Michelle asked permission to buy a flexible type ruler. She checked the price from one of her friend and came back to inform me that it costs RM1.20. Since she’s quite keen I gave her the green light and provided her the required amount.

Yesterday while she got into the car (when I picked her up), she confessed that since the stall is not open during recess time she had used the money to buy a drink and a packet of sweets.

Back home, I bathed her and told her that I want to have a one on one session with her. She got the feeling that I’m going to punish her for her action. I let her settled down, closed the room door and begin the “disciplining” session with her.

I asked her to tell me her side of story, why she had used the money to buy something else, something I prohibited and in which she clearly understood. Yeah to many it’s just a small matter but I wanted her to learn that firstly she needs to seek permission if she wanted to use the money for something else, secondly not to be easily influenced by her peers and thirdly to be able to make a wise decision on her own in our absence.

I did not cane her but I stressed that I will not be hesitate to do so if she was to repeat her mistake. I gave her some time to think about her action, (by now she’s already crying), and if she has fully understood why I need to discipline her and later to wash her face and prepare for dinner.

I went in for a shower and saw this note on my dressing table (bear with her broken English and wrong spelling):

This is what she wrote:
"I take my friend twenty sen
can I take twenty sen back to her tomorrow
sorry mummy
plese fogive me
plese don't rod me
I love you mummy
I am sad"

Still crying she confessed that she has done something very wrong, she asked RM0.20 from a friend to buy a packet of sweets as she has lost the 20 cents I gave her earlier. She asked for forgiveness and whether she can have 20 cents tomorrow to return to her friend. Suddenly I found my eyes were in tears, not because of her disobedience but I was touched by her openness to admit her wrong doing. From her note I can see how sorry she was and how bad she must have felt for doing what she had done. She can choose not to tell be about it, quietly took 20 cents from her coin box and pretend nothing has happened, but I’m glad she choose to be honest and brave enough to bear the consequences of her action.

Michelle, mummy is proud of you and mummy will love you just the same….

This morning, she called me repeatedly while I was in the kitchen, I went into the room in which she said “mummy let’s hug hug”…ah what I wonderful moment, I won’t want to miss this for anything….. Oh God grant me wisdom to be a good mom.


miche said...

aaawww...she is such a darling. big girl already, dun cane her any more on one talk can already eh. :)

dorene said...

i'm so touched just by reading this...she is indeed very honest..please tell her "BRAVO" for me.

Wai Wai said...

Michelle, each time I cane (if have to), it leaves a scar in my heart... yeah I would prefer one on one talk too..

Dorene, I will...

Anonymous said...

sigh... i know how exactly it felt to cane the kids... my Erica was disciplined last Sunday after church for delibrately disobeyed my instruction. For once, I really cane her and grounded her in her room for few hours...

i, too, prayed so hard that God will give me the wisdom and patient to be a good mother.

Wai Wai said...

Hi Deb, somehow we need to do that but let's remember to assure them of our love and purpose for the disciplining... it all boils down to LOVE and not anger or pride..

MamaJo said...

I'm touch too by your openess!! I guess girl is always girl, always so open and willing to confess their mistake compare to boy.
Both my sons esp Jonathan just won't admit his fault and being so stubborn to admit it even though he know he is wrong....aiyah....headache...


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